Lawyers for Ariel Castro, the Cleveland resident being charged with kidnapping, rape, and possibly murder in connection with the abductions of three women and their confinement over several years, say he will plead not guilty. One added that it is offensive people are demonizing Castro before they know all the facts. He further commented that Castro is being held in isolation in a 6’ x 10’ cell with a metal slab bed and a thin mat and blanket.
Keeping in mind that it is only in the eyes of the law that one is presumed innocent until proven guilty, and considering the women’s conditons of confinement, I’d say Castro is living large.
…Besides, even if Castro were not arrested, he’s still be living in Cleveland.
Oh. While you’re at it, we can use some more orthopedic surgeons.
Sometimes the story is its own punchline.
Colorado Congresswoman Diane Degette, co-sponsor of a bill to ban magazines with more than a ten-bullet capacity, stated that this ban will be effective because, as such currently-owned magazines are eventually fired, they’ll be used up, and no more will be available. Evidently, Degette doesn’t know magazines are reloadable and reusable.
Members of Congress are paid $174,000 annually, received lavish benefits and perks, and are allowed to officially earn another 15% of their salary in outside activities.
Evidently, Degette earns her extra 15% as a professional assclown.
The bad news: I gotta walk around looking dorky for a few weeks.
The good news: In California, a bad haircut qualifies me for a medical marijuana card.
Remember when President Obama wanted to show he wasn’t anti-gun, so the White House released a photo of him firing a shotgun? Well, turns out, it was photoshopped. Reporters became suspicious when Obama claimed he shoots skeet two or three times a month, then added, “…and they taste delicious!”
Just kidding… Reporters never become suspicious of Obama.